Our deepest fear

>> Thursday, April 16, 2009

<<" Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. ">>
Marianne Williamson


Hello everyone. I thought I'd share this wonderful quote with all of you, especially inspired by Nana Yaw and Blogoratti for their poetic wisdom.
If having read any of my previous posts, you'll know my motto is "face your fears and live your dreams" - I think the above quote is a good elaboration of just that. This is a truth that way too many people take for granted. I don't know about everyone else, but to me this is a constant battle. I think it will get easier over the years, but our challenges change as we enter new chapters of our lives and with new chapters come new fears.


The quote applies to so many different areas of life.

It has to do with going for what you want in life and believing in yourself enough to go and get it. That's not as easy as it sounds. I know several examples from my own life - for instance I deeply regret not focusing on my dancing 100% when I was younger - for some reason my confidence wasn't high enough and I didn't believe I could do it. Now I realise I was actually really good with some serious potential. And I loved it in a special way. I have never felt as good again, in the same way, since I last performed. But I will not dwell - I am moving on to my other goals. I still find it hard to believe I can do it, allthough I know that I can. Weird paradox. The difference from before is that now, nothing will stop me and I've grown older and wiser.

On a more serious note - when facing serious struggle, numerous downfalls and deep depression, remaining in that deep hole feels more safe than having faith in better days. Why? I believe that we're always scared of getting hurt again, but as this quote accentuates, we are afraid of succeeding because of the change it implies. The scary unknown.
There was a time I was at my deepest low and I had given up completely. It lasted for a long time and I was even hospitalized. Because I was tired. Too tired to want to try one. More. Time... Again. Since then I have decided I will never go back to that point. If I survived that I will continue to survive.

We are afraid of change when we have never experienced the better days. Because we don't know how to handle them, because we've never learnt how to and never experienced them before. We tend to stay close to the kind of life and people we've already experienced. Too often we choose what is safe to us, lacking the courage to take a leap of faith to a better place. We need to remember that we can be anything that we want to be, and reality is what we make it out to be. This sounds simplified, but it is what it all boils down to. We attract to ourselves what we believe in. Try it.
First we have to realise that how we feel is mostly within our own personal control. Once we learn how to control our own brain and our feelings we become powerful beyond measure, and in turn inspire other people to do the same. Because they can see evidence of the endless posibilities.

17 comments:

BSNC April 16, 2009 at 4:58 PM  

hmmm that was pretty deep. yes i think i fall into that category, trying to do what its safe and being inside my comfort zone.

you are right. you just gave me something to think about.. nice post.

Nana Yaw Asiedu April 16, 2009 at 6:04 PM  

Awwww, profound post ... speaking to me from line one to the last...the saying is sooooo true...your personal view even more so...thanks for this one...been at the bottom of some sick emotional pit lately...let's see if this picks me up...i'll let you know.

Rose April 16, 2009 at 6:37 PM  

Though the saying once bitten twice shy has some element of truth...i guess we really have to stand up and make the most of the little we've been blessed with...

As humans...we are quite scared of change..but as it is the only constant in life,we have to toughen up ourselves and accept it though...sometimes...it falls short of our expectations..which i must say are often a bit too high..and unrealistic...
Really enlightening post...
How are you dear??

Omo Oba April 16, 2009 at 6:48 PM  

"being afraid of change" - I can say that for myself too. too often I settle into a box, and what other people expect of me, too afraid to venture out there. but what is life w/o change?! That quote btw is one of the most powerful statements out there. So I hope you still dance?

yankeenaijababe April 16, 2009 at 8:29 PM  

Wow, that was pretty deep...you so right, the moment it clicks in our brain that we can be what we want to be...it changes everything. Thanks for sharing.

I missed coming to your blog. Good to be back. You have a fun filled day. Cheers!!!

jhazmyn April 16, 2009 at 9:37 PM  

My sis said sumthing today..."Ć«veryday you wake up and look in the mirror, the reflection you see starring back is what you'd be all day..so see great things, cos the more u see, the more u become", now this...hmmm, food for thought

blogoratti April 16, 2009 at 9:45 PM  

I'm liking the opening quote-it reads like a victory song...
A read through your post brought out the warmest of smiles...it touches deep*
I can relate with it all...
Thank you for that and i'm glad to be of an inspiration..

Living Safe and Green in Nigeria April 16, 2009 at 9:57 PM  

I love that quote.

You are quite right about being resistant to change and how that can stall one's potential.

posekyere April 16, 2009 at 11:24 PM  

You surely are a philosopher, Adaeze!
Your deep understanding and rich analyses of life is refreshing to the extreme.
I have a picture of you in my mind as a psycho-analyst.

Bibi April 17, 2009 at 6:46 AM  

*sigh* that was some wake up call. true words. from beginning. i need to come to your blog more often

Adaeze April 17, 2009 at 12:31 PM  

@ BSNC - I'm glad I could give you something to think about. it's never easy but to be aware of the idea helps.

@ Nana - awww - wow I am so glad I could do for you some of what you have done for me. I have also been at some sick emotional pit. If this helps you I will be thrilled. Please do let me know :)

@ Rose - So true! Once bitten twice shy and change being the only constant. It's so hard for me to accept even though I wrote this post but that's what it is, its something you need to learn gradually I guess? I am alright hun, although quite tired. How are you?

@ Omo Oba - Unfortunately I haven't danced for a couple of years...I still do it at home in front of the mirror though LOL. But the plan is as soon as I get into good enough shape I'll be doing it as a hobby. So true, what IS life without change? I encourage you to venture out there and I will try to do the same..doing it together makes it easier?

@ YNC - I'm glad to see you back! And hope you will return soon ;-)

@ Jhazmyn - what she said was food for thought too yes...I'm going to have to go think about that!

@ Blogoratti - I'm glad you liked it and glad you can relate. You'll always be an inspiration.

@ LSGN - I'm glad you liked it. Love the theme of your blog!

@ Posekyere - Says the other philosopher..Yes I am a philosopher it can be tiring at times, lol. I am only an amateur psycho-analyst, lol. I contemplated studying it because it comes natural for me but in my journey to VENTURE OUT THERE like this post just said I've chosen something else..Ur so right though. I wonder what else u imagine, and if it would be correct, lol.

@ Bibi - ur welcome any time girl

StandTall-The Activist April 17, 2009 at 6:02 PM  

Words so true and so meaningful. Thanks for sharing dear

Cidersweet April 21, 2009 at 7:46 AM  

I first heard that strength-giving quote in Coach Carter (Samuel L. Jackson), and it still inspires me, altho I am still scared of letting my light shine. Is it really true that when we shine, we free others to shine too? Sometimes. Other times people will be unhappy at our progress, but my Sis always tells me to shine, not to let fear stunt me, becuz yrs from now, she wudnt want me to have regrets 'Y'know, I shud have done that...'
Maybe we shud spend more time listening to inspiring voices as M. Williamson (thanks for sharing it)so that our confidence grows.

Have a very good week. Feel Unlimited.

Olufunke April 21, 2009 at 3:37 PM  

I so love the quote.
I agree with you.
Nice post!

Enkay April 22, 2009 at 9:08 AM  

True! Sometimes I ask myself, why can't I just throw caution to the winds and take a plunge?!

I've made some progress in my life but deep inside me i know I could have done better.

Fear slows me down and sometimes makes me make mistakes. The good thing though is that I'm learning and maturing everyday. It may not be as fast as i want but it sure is working.

Thanks for this post. Thanks too for your very kind words on my blog!
Much love!!

Adaeze April 22, 2009 at 4:44 PM  

@ Standtall - You're welcome my dear!

@ Cidersweet - I wondered just that same thing. Of course it's a matter that can be discussed, but ultimately I think it is true. Because when we shine (read:become "something", accomplish goals etc) we become examples of what is possible and do inspire people to do their thing? Thank you for your sweet wishes.

@ Olafunke - I love the quote too. Thanks :-)

@ Enkay - You sound like me! Yes "the good thing is that I'm learning and maturing every day" - that is what life is about no? You're very welcome mydear.

aloted April 22, 2009 at 5:46 PM  

kai this post is so deep and on point!

hmmmmmm got me thinking

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